I wrote a spec script for "Pushing Daisies" while it was still on the air. In this storyline, the characters are investigating the suspicious death of an aquarium curator.
INT. PIE HOLE - NIGHT
Emerson, Ned, Chuck and Olive are back in the booth. Ned's dog, Digby, sits at the end of the booth by Olive.
NEDChuck ventures a scrap of Moby Dick:
The assistant said that Kermit kept his cone snail farm right on his desk.
OLIVE
That's right! On his desk! Can you believe it?
CHUCK
What are you guys talking about?
NED
If Kermit were stabbed by one of his snails, he could die.
CHUCK
Stabbed?
NED
With a tiny harpoon.
CHUCK
Like a tiny Queequeg!
NED
It's actually a tooth, but yeah, I guess.
CHUCKThey hesitate, then go on as though Chuck hadn't actually said that first part.
"Queequeg disdained no seeming ignominy."
OLIVE
Why on earth would this curator spend so much time around something that could kill him? Something he couldn't even touch? It's not like...a dog.
(talking-to-dog-voice)
Right, Digby?
NED
Obviously those snails are irresistible.
OLIVE
One of those snails could kill this curator with one wrong move, and he works right next to them? Keeps them as pets?
CHUCK
Well, there's the rich gastropod fossil record dating into the Cambrian, and I'm sure he's doing research on reproductive biology and comparative anatomy.
(beat; looks at Ned)
There's no love without risk.
OLIVE
Too much risk. Like wearing a copperhead as a necklace.
EMERSON
(nodding, picturing this)
Yeah. That'd be a hot look.
OLIVE
Anyway, Toby went on and on about the aquarium's new leafy sea dragon.
EMERSON
Cowgill mentioned that, too.
OLIVE
Oh, and she invited us to a masquerade party!
EMERSON
Fine. That'll give us more time to look around. And maybe I can finally get a damn nap.
OLIVE
I'd be careful about where you took that nap.
EMERSON
(to Olive)
What else that exhibit designer tell you?
OLIVE
She had an unreciprocated crush on the dead curator. You know, before.
EMERSON
More than enough reason for someone to kill.
OLIVE
Oh, she's not our killer.
EMERSON
Why, 'cause she was nice?
OLIVE
Well...yeah.
NED
Emerson, what else did the director say?
EMERSON
Old boy's real big on tradition. Keeper of the flame for a long line of dead Cowgills. Thinks you gotta run into the future holding the past like two grenades.
(off their reactions)
I paraphrase. Anyways, Cowgill's just about wettin' his trousers over that leafy sea bacon.
NED
Leafy sea bacon?
OLIVE
(whispers to Ned behind her hand)
Diet.